My Lovely Snoring Wife

You may think that this is Groucho and his girlfriend. Well, it is Groucho, but it is my wife that he is with! She was all over the place at this party......not a drop of wine either. Plain coke.
I cut her off early. I made her sleep in the family room that night. Not because I was mad at her......it was the obnoxious snoring. She drinks nothing but root beer now......no snoring! Love that girl.

Lulu's Special Call

Twinkle, twinkle little star
how I wonder who you are
up above the world so high
like a diamond in the sky.



Twinkle, twinkle little star,
how I wonder who you are.

I love you Papa! Call me!


The above was left on my cell phone
after I came off of my graveyard job.

Being a grandparent is unbelievable!

Thank you Lulu. I love you!!!!

Papa

So, I knew an old lady who swallowed a horse. She died, of course.

It has been awhile since I did this posting-blogging thing, and I actually started feeling guilty, and, responsible for all of my worldwide friends out there. IS THERE ANYBODY OUT THERE? What famous 60's Pink Floyd-type group made that a very popular lyric in one of their songs? Fifty bucks to the first one to answer that.....

What have I've been doing? Working. Substitute Para Educator in our local school district. I work with special needs students, and, they are special. My life has changed because of them. I work in a drug & alcohol treatment center.....I work with addicts...for alcohol dependency, meth users, heroine users, oxycontin users, men and women, young and old. This is a fabulous job....helping others. My life has changed because of them. I still have my flooring business....started that adventure in 1979.....about 4 years ago I decided to slow it down so I could pursue other adventures, so I gave up all of my commercial accounts, and I have been concentrating on just residential customers. Not to pick on commercial customers, but the atmosphere has changed due to our crazy economy, and they're not much fun to do business with any more......I get a 'thanks' from my residential customers, and not so much from the commercial peoples....Hey, they have things on their mind and I understand that. By staying away from those jobs, I have time to pursue things that I want to do. Like being a better husband. Like being a better dad. Like being a better friend. Like appreciating life alot more. And doing Gods will everyday, and every moment of my life.

Oh, am I blessed guy! You betcha Chester. Who's Chester? He is the brother of Mary Alice.

And.........My wife and I have some rental properties that I take care of. I get to climb on roofs, clean gutters, paint stuff, power warsh stuff, weed wack weeds (you're right, I don't pull' em) and if those darn weeds come back, I go to Home Depot and buy the most powerful weed and vegetation killer known to man and womankind, and I just spray the crap out of those little dandelions. I actually hear those dandelions scream when they get the spray. Not really. Just kidding. My favorite part of being a landlord is doing electrical stuff. The only thing I do when it comes to electrical is changing light bulbs. Anything beyond that I call in the big boys....you know, the electrical contractors that actually know what they are doing.

Grandparents. No, not mine. They're dead. Have been for a long time. Me and my wife. We are grandparents to the best little guys in the world. "Honey, what are their names again?" Oh yea. Lulu and Levi. Best darn family job there is on this earth. They smile no matter what, and cry at times that us adults don't understand. Oh well, I love them dearly. I can't wait to beat up my grand daughters first boyfriend. Just kidding. I just want to make him nervous all the time. I will escort them on their first 10 dates, or until my daughter calls me off....even then, I'll still follow them. I just wont tell her. Plus, I imagine that my son-in-law will be in the car with me. That will be fun. We'll have a good evening, topped off with ice cream. Wow.

I sold my little BMW to my next door neighbor for $500. Blue book said it was worth $1500.

So, my neighbor got a great car for a great price. Drivers side door was ready to fall off though. Broken hinge pin. Needed a good, creative welder. Yes, my neighbor knew....took it anyway.

He evidently found that welder.

I haven't been chased by any grizzly bears lately in my dreams. Had those scary dreams alot after I came home from Alaska in the mid 70's. I actually went Grizzly bear hunting down paths that only the bears made.....tall, tall grass out in the Aleutians Islands....I did the 'Deadliest Catch" job back then. Very hard job. Very dangerous job. Very lucrative job if you were on the right boat.....and I was. Very good skipper and very safe. My claim to fame was that I could light a match, and keep it lit, to help my deck mates smoke their cigarettes.....in 120 mile an hour gale! More like a hurricane I think. Yikes. Oh the stories I have. That will be another post...

Until we meet again..your posting pal. Tom G.

Kimmy

Dear Lulu and Levi,

27 years ago, your mother was born. Kimberly. But in my mind and heart, she became my wonderful daughter Kimmy. It is hard to imagine that my little daughter is now 27 years old. As most parents do, we think back that it was just yesterday......

While holding Kimmy for the first time in the delivery room, she arched her back so hard that I almost dropped her.

And, thinking in the delivery room how absolutely wonderful it was to have a daughter. Also thinking that I wanted Kimmy to be one year old.......Thats when the real fun begins. I couldn't wait.

Visiting Cannon Beach......As a very young little girl, Kimmy could make it down to Haystack Rock (about 1 mile) without too much trouble, but she could barley think of the return trip, and about that time, she would give me that very sad, tired , hungry look.......OK Kimmy. Hop on my back, I'll carry you.....a few rest stops along the way of course.....

Kimmy sitting in the back of our station wagon, also at Cannon Beach, with the windows down, maybe 4 to 5 years old, yelling at people as they walked past the car......yelling funny things, or gibberish.....and then, like a statue, not moving, when those yelled at, looked for this little thing with so much mischief.

And your mommy also was good at getting her older brother in trouble. Kimmy would love to antagonize uncle Todd while they both were in the back seat of our huge Buick Electra. (it would seat about 20) For along time, Grandma and I would get mad at Todd when Kimmy would start crying that her brother had "touched her"...or..."hit her" in the back seat.....one day I decided
to turn the rear view mirror so that I could watch the back seat......we found that as Kimmy would be looking out the window, she would all of a sudden yell out "Todd hit me!" Kimmy was a little trouble maker.

Lulu and Levi.....ask your mom about the copper sheet we used with her....it's a pretty funny story.

I could go on and on......Your mommy, Lulu and Levi, is the best. She learned from the best, and has total love in her heart for you both. Your grandma and Papa are so proud of her. She is the best daughter, person, wife, and friend to all of us. People admire her, because she is a loving, and, wonderful mom, daughter, sister, friend, and wife!

Kimmy. I love you.

Daddy

OK, did you all recognize the music in the last post?

Yes everyone, it was Mitch Miller and his orchestra.

That Mitch Miller knows him music!

Now, who is this artist?

Be prepared for a new post soon.

In the meantime, please listen

to this beautiful music.

Tom G.

Chair Man, and other oddities

Hello my fellow friends. This is Tom, your fellow friend, blogger, poster, and dancer. Remember, I used to do the gator, so yes, I have on my resume "dancer". Shut up Chris. Although I made it through the entire week without getting screamed at, I have been given the crabby look. Before I go on, scream is a funny word....in my opinion, which I rarely give to anyone on anything, (unless of course I am right and my opinion is needed) the word, "scream" should never be used. Unless it is used in the grocery store and you must find the I Scream. I love I Scream. Vanilla. All other flavors I can do without. Tillamooks Chocolate-Peanut Butter...horrible. Safeway brand Butter Pecan.....don't waste your money. Any brand of Chocolate Chip Mint......I'd rather watch paint dry, which, by the way I did a few weeks back when sweetness and I painted our bathroom. I did all the painting, and the whole time my wife said that if I did a good job, and finish that day, that I could have one scoop of vanilla ice cream.

I love that lady. I did ask for 2 scoops. She said I could have a second scoop when I paint our house this summer.

w

Now, getting back to the original thought in the first paragraph.......I got the crabby look because

my 3 girlfriends were basically telling me that I was ignoring my blogger obligations to my pals. So, what the heck, I told 'em I'd go for it. I told them I'd do one next week, and they said fine. I'm fooling them. I'm doing it now! WOW. Brown Cow. I love poetry, especially when it rhymes. And.....here is a picture of my 3 girlfriends. Love them all. If you look carefully, you'll see that one of them has 6 toes. Weird. I'm just kidding. I'm the one with 6 toes.

Hi there. I just had a lesson on how to move words, and pictures, when blogging, posting, or whatever this is that I'm doing. Oh rats, my wife says I have to start cooking now, so I have to go. She's scary. Maybe I'll come back this evening when I'm done folding the clothes. You laugh....this is serious business......in addition to dancing, I'm a folder. Good with socks and towels. By the way, I have two types of socks, and, only 2 colors. About 20 pairs of white for casual dining, and, about 2 pair of black for when I go jogging.

So a fond farewell from my chair, who I taught to smile....... and me. (the smiling chair is way at the top of this post in case you missed it). You are all good people out there..... decide to make a difference tomorrow. Take care. Eat I Scream. Tom

PS It took me 5 years to teach my chair to smile.